Family and Weddings

June 3, 2009

When a person finds out I’m engaged, one of the first things they always ask is, “Is it going to be a big wedding?”  I’m not quite sure what that means. I assume they mean “big guest list”.  And even that is pretty subjective.  I usually reply with, “Well, my dad has 12 siblings, so we can’t really have a ‘small’ wedding…”

And it’s true.  My family is pretty huge.  Actually, for having that many aunts and uncles, my family should be even larger than it actually is.  Our guest list is limited to aunts, uncles, and first cousins. And grandparents, of course.  That right there is over 100 people.  Eek.  I even cut out a few cousins. (Shhh. They’ll never know.)

With my family being so big, it’s hard for everyone to be up-to-date on family news. Case in point: I was at my grandma’s house one day and saw a picture of my cousin Nate, in a suit, standing next to a woman in a white dress. “Oh, Nate got married?”

“Yes, a few months ago.”

Yeah, that’s just how it works.

I also just recently found out I have a cousin who is engaged and getting married less than a month after us.  Yeah, good to know.  Good thing we weren’t planning for the same day, because who knows when we would have found out.  Needless to say, neither of these cousins made the cut for my guest list.  I might get invited to the wedding that is a month after mine, but it’s out of town and I really have no interest in going.  I can’t even remember all of my cousins names!  That’s just my family dynamic, I guess.

Po had a cousin get married in Florida on St. Patrick’s Day.  Only their parents, sibling, and one close friend attended.  They had their AHR (At Home Reception) last weekend.  Po’s cousin, the groom, told me during the dollar dance (yes, they did one, and no I do not find it horribly tacky) that he had already requested the day off at work for our wedding! We haven’t even requested vacation days yet for our wedding!  Po’s family is a lot closer than mine. Even his brother and sister-in-law drove 7 hours to come to this reception, because “Grandma wants everyone there.”

I know I can count on nearly every single one of his relatives attending our wedding, even though it’s on a Friday.  I’m secretly (or not so secretly) hoping that our Friday date deters some of my family members from coming!  There’s just too many of them and I’m only close to a small handful.  I have a feeling this is why our pre-marital survey we took as part of our counseling through our church told me that my family is “disconnected”.  Colin’s results showed that he was much more “connected”. Luckily, our own family relationship between the two of us came out perfectly balanced, right smack in the middle of the graph.

I am the only one who doesn’t care if all of their family attends their wedding?

(And P.S. Our invites are PRINTED! Now for cutting and assembly. More on that to come later.)


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